Being angry is one of our core natural responses of this world, and at the same time anger and its expression and reception are tied in with cultural values and expectations.
We know that in some cultures a feisty temperament is simply the way to express ourselves whilst in other cultures the raising of voices is unacceptable and we end up feeling ashamed of who we are.
I think about childhood and infancy, and how anger commonly appears more acceptable the younger the child.
Yet, already by toddler-time most of us become socially conditioned to reject our anger, which means that our anger is deprived of its opportunity to develop.
This conditioning has implications.
It means that natural expressions become locked away inside of us and here they begin to fester in one way or another, a process which is not good for you. Festering anger affects relationships and social interactions and can lead to clinical depression.
Put differently, the anger that you seek to control says ‘no thank you’ and begin to do its own thing, which means it’s out of your control.
If worked with appropriately, anger can be transformed into authority and expression.